My Gramps.

Thanksgiving was my Grandpa’s favorite holiday, and yesterday—just a handful of days after turning 89—my grandpa passed away. Though it was no surprise, it is still heartbreaking to lose anyone you love. And I sure did love him. His eyes and smile that lit up his face. His kind heart. His soft-spoken demeanor (at least in later years after we were all old enough to stop pissing him off by jumping on the beds!). His scruffy-beard kisses. His perfectly bald head. He always had a newspaper crossword puzzle folded in his hands and a hankie in his pocket. That was my Gramps.

[A picture from May of last year when my cousin got married.]

Gramps was an amazing cook, trained in the forces as the submarine pastry chef. And though I can’t say I was able to adopt his talent, I do make a pretty mean blueberry muffin, which was an iconic breakfast treat we would eat when we spent the night at his house. Gramps went to bed early and woke up early. And he was always listening to talk radio in the dining room—and doing his crossword puzzle—when we would mosey downstairs in the morning, with the smell of those muffins waking up our noses!

[Snuggling in bed with my Grandpa when I had to be about 2 years old.]

Gramps was my—all of the grandchildren, really—biggest fan. He attended almost as many of my ice skating competitions as I did, and he supported me from the stands by blowing a wooden train whistle that was louder than the cheers of any other spectator. Of course it was mortifying, but my friends and I always knew when he was in attendance! 

[Gramps with my Great Grandma (his mom) and my dad in the background at one of my ice skating shows.]

Growing up, I was fortunate enough to go on family trips with him and my grandma to obscure locations around the Midwest. Among those trips: A blueberry festival in Michigan, a lumberjacking competition in Wisconsin, the Field of Dreams in Iowa, and a summertime loge resort in Illinois. We would caravan to these destinations—my mom, aunts, cousins, and me. And whoever got “stuck” riding with Gramps behind the wheel would listen to him sing songs from the past that would tie in with our destination all the while driving at a max speed of 45 mph. And if ever we asked him “Are we there yet?” his answer would always be “in an hour-and-a-half.” 

Life got busy, I got older and time passed. But my Grandpa was always a big part of my life.

[Gramps, me, and Sadie more than 13 years ago!]

He attended my wedding. Kept the secret that I was pregnant with Jacob until I gave him the all-clear. And hitched a ride to our house for every single birthday party that my kids had. He took on the new name of “Great Great-Pa” and the kids and I took regular trips up to his new, assisted living residence—“The Hotel” as he called it—to swim in the pool. My boys loved going there to swim as Gramps sat poolside and undoubtedly thanked his lucky stars that the chaos of my family was only temporary and that he would enjoy the quiet after we left!

[Mason’s second and third birthday parties. Three out of four generations. My mom is very elusive when it comes time to take pictures!]

Gramps was a man with few emotions and even fewer words, and never said “I love you,” at least not to me. Not long ago, though, I received a phone call from my Grandpa who had clearly accidently dialed me as he was trying to reach my mom. The confusion of modern cell phones—stories for another time—but we got talking for a minute, he and I did,—which was huge. In fact, it was a game to see who could keep Grandpa on the phone the longest. And, really, anything over a minute and you were going for world record status! But as we were getting off the phone—which would turn out to be our last phone conversation—I told Gramps that I loved him, as I always did. And, instead of the usual “OK, honey,” he responded back with an “I love you, too.” Of course I already knew that, but it was something special to hear, and decades in the making!

I spent our last visit together not more than a week or so ago, and though our visit was brief, I got to see the twinkle in his eyes one last time, and I will carry that with me forever.

[Gramps wearing one of my cousin Cortney’s wigs many, many years ago. See that twinkle?!]

And though it was hard to say goodbye to Gramps on a holiday, it was fitting that my Grandpa passed on Thanksgiving so that he could spend his favorite holiday with all of those he loved! I truly am blessed to have had such a wonderful Grandpa and to share so many memories with him!